People I See

Hey people ! its such a long time and i bet no one would be reading this blog now but I dont care :D

Over this holiday, I met Clean monster and he emphasized on my appearance. Yes, he's right. I need a complete change of wardrobe before school starts. People judge you by appearance, for the 1st impression. If your appearance doesnt appeals to them, no way they gonna start a conversation with you. People look at you 1st, the way you dress, your body language, expressions... That's what basically form up the 1st impression right? If you pass it, you guys can become friends :D I'm not sure whether I'm right or it just doesnt applies to everyone. But at least that something i can start with right??

I want to be a very sociable person. I dont want to be the person who sits at the corner, minding their own business, dreaming of their own little fantasy. I dont want to stay in my own world anymore, I want to enter other people's world too and maybe have some fun. Me too, want people to come and join my world. But i dont know how. I dont really know how to make friends. My bestfriends are usually the outcasted people in the class, LiJing and Anna. Not much people likes them, i think... But well, now i have to meet a whole new set of people in Poly now but i just dont know how to get along with them, as if i already know who they are already... huh.Yes, i can be friendly at the start but i dont know how to continue after that. I dont know how to talk. I dont know what to talk. I dont know how to joke around. I dont know a lot of things.

SO HERE COME BAOYUDI :D a small little introduction about him! I knew him through shopnsave. It was during the CNY period when SNS need extra people to help out with the CNY stocks.  My duty was to watch over the abalones in the morning and baoyudi was to watch them in the night :) so it was quite an interesting encounter i suppose haha He's quite a smart person and talented with musical instruments. I like him. He's someone i wanted to be. Haha

I'm super glad that he came in to my life. He taught me a lot of things to. He's further explaining stuff of what Clean Monster taught me. Now i know why i dont know how to communicate with people is because i'm lack of knowledge. Since you and that person doesnt have a common topic to talk about nor a common interest, there's nothing that can be shared. Even there's no common topic, well, at least you're good at something and that you can talk about for a long time. Sharing your knowledge with other people and they will do that the same to you. Isnt this how you expand ur knowledge? Through people... Its better than the net and videos for me.... :/ And then further emphasis on my appearance that I have to start wearing something more girlish? Something to to show off (is that the right word?) that i got, those curves and all... Other than just baggy t-shirts, maybe something nicer tight fitting... You have to look good in order to get attention right? Then people will think 'oh hey she looks nice. I wonder where she bought her clothes... Maybe i shall ask her! ' and all these stuff. I mean, that's a way to start a conversation right? :D

Gosh. I'm moving slow. but i'm not giving up. To the person i want to be !!

Endless of Searching

一只舞蹈， 最重要的是生命力。

Well, this place is mostly dead so I dont think anyone would read it... But oh well

4months of holiday had gone and I think i really spent well my holiday. First was prom and chalet. Played for  awhile and find it meaningless again. But i found an awesome friend, who is becoming a stranger again. GongCha is up next and is fun ! Making drinks and everything, finally know how all bubbleteas really work. No wonder sometime it take so long, because there's newbie like me who always very lost. AHA came in and it is something that i would never forget. Knew awesome people like Maycia and Valerie ! Both of them are amazing and talented people. And of course Joanna, Raynice and loads of people haha And then this person just suddenly pop up in my life to make such a big change, then left. WTF...
If you're reading this clean monster, I do miss you and I'm super grateful for all the things that you taught me. I will never ever forget you and the lessons, lectures. You really help me to become a person i wants. Even though i may not be producing gd results, I will never stop trying. A friend that i wish everybody has, a guardian angel. Thank you.
Then here comes the results and posting of schools. USS with my awesome girls! It was really super fun and I wont ever have the thought of jumping off any building. Its just too freaking scary. Shall try other ways to die. NAH KIDDING. Then CNY and shopnsave. Eventful uhh... Haha :P Hope more things would happen.. :D

Stay tune peeps! :)

In A Rush

O level is just within 3 weeks and i am not doing enough. The efforts that i put in is no match to the otheres. I know that i am better than that, i could do better than that but theres's so much distraction that i couldnt hold myself anymore. Self-discipline! Must discipline myself... but... i dont know what i want anymore. I am lost. I need you to guide me, lead me, motivate me. You are my driving foce, my motivation. But now, you're gone and i am all left is a broken heart. I need you in a rush.

No more fairytales.

Maybe this is better .

Life's short. Things might not always go as you want. But what can you do? There's always something that you cant do anything wif it. Look at what you have and not what you dont have. Be contented.

I know this girl and boy. They were couples but as you know, boys flirt cheats and everything. Maybe he thought being in a relationship is fun, stepping 2 boats at a time. He fell hard for the another girl. It break th girl's heart but yet, she didnt give up. She want him back at her side like how they were. She did alot for him but, what she received is just another snow storm. Go out with him even when she knew that he's thinking of th other. She watched him go out with other girls, being in a relationship with other girls. She waited. Silly girl, she deserves better -.- That boy is a jerk. But she dont blame him. She knows that he just cant help but falling in love with her. She understands. She forgave.

Both love each other but... he didnt love her whole. His heart dont belongs to her fully. Yet, he's selfish. He wanted her too... When he's in another relationship, he still wanted her around. Silly girl stay arounds as he wished. Comfort him when he was dumped... Help them to get back...

One day, the girl had enough. She decide to leave him. He knew it's the best for her so he let her go. She packed all th things that he had gave her and give it all back to him. It was hard for him too. All these things were their memories. Her giving it all back to him was just too much. He cant take it. He left it there and both of them jus walk away... Strangers.

After a few days, the boy text the girl. He says that he dont this, he dont them to be strangers. He cant take it.   This goes the same to the girl. Both them were very sad ever since that day... Both of them knew that they cant make it... Walking past each other like strangers, they just cant take it. That's when they were back like how they were. But not as a couple. Maybe they do behave like a couple but they never will.

One day, the boy asked the girl to be his girlfriend. The girl says no. She rather to be in this way. If they never get tgt, they will never breakup. She prefer to stay at his side like this, be there whenever he needed anyone. Just like this... Maybe this is really better for them... At least she's free.

LALALALA :D

大傻瓜

Tomorrow is my exams yet i still blogging here. I should be dating with my books now! -.-

Someone is coming to over to play and watch vampire diaries despite the fact that he knew i need to study and VD will distract completely. Man, can you start thinking for the others? If you want to go die, i cant help. If you draggin me down, i'm sorry that i might leave you. Time to do something for myself ^^ Did so much for you yet you're still the old you. What for i did all these for you when you dont even appreciate it? Why not i do it for myself -.-

Heard your family story. I'm sorry that i'm more afraid of you :X Guess that's the reason why you dont always tell me your secrets. I just hope. Hope that you wont be like him when you grow up...

SSSSSSSSSSSTUUUUUUUUDDDDDDDDY Choco<3

The whisper of screams

Busy busy.... EOY starts today and i guess i screwed up all the papers i took today >< Must work extra efforts on the compre !! If not i will be dead meat. 

Super distracted during exams >< When can i stop thinking? Bad habit, bad habit. Gahhh Studies is more important than you. You cant even take care of yourself and depending on you? Erm, i dont want to add on your troubles :) I rather I depend on me myself. It's more safer :P 

Your exams are in weeks away and you still planning to go play -.- Did you really gave up? Or you need a little push? You told me that you would start studying now AND YET U STILL WANT PLAYY?!?! U even asked me to go play with you. Man, dont you dare to screw my studies out. You can screw me as much as you want but not my studies! 1 day, i'm gonna prove it to you that you would regrett everything that you did to me. Bleh! 

I havent start any revision so pratically, i dont think i will do well for EOY. I swear i'm gonna study everything again during the december holidays. I must. If not my sec4 life will be doomed. Yeah, i know. I need to stop using 'doom' and 'practically' and all such of words. I need a better vocab. Like seriously. -.- 

Off to study bio!~~ :D 

Another normal day

Hey guys! Back to blogging nowdays :D One of the reason is that i'm too lazy to write in my dear diary, Milky<3. I'm so sorry Milky that i had neglected you for so long due to my laziness D; But no matter what you will always keep you at my side! Hehe

Had our F&N practical exam today and it's kind of rush so mrs yap extended it for another haf an hour ^^ If not, i bet a lot of people would hav unable to complete it in time. I think i will fail my practical O.O Everything was a mess D; 1st horror was that we discovered that we dont have enough time to mix 1 by 1 so we need to mix everything together so it messed up all our steps that we had set on our paper. Measuring the ingredient was very time consuming. Here comes the mixing of everything. It was a disaster man... The dough just twirl around the whisk and it was a hard time to get everything out. My apron kena a lot of it D; And so does the surrounding >< After that still need to measure how much for each muffin so wasted alot of time D; In the end, 1 of the muffin over flowed.... Aish... So practically, my practical is doom.

Tomorrow will be my mother tongue prelim yet i dont sense any nervousness. It's seems like it just a small test and i could just fail it :X Gahhh! From now on must treat every test and exam seriously! Yeah, as if i would... -.-! Haix!

Gonna be in the same room, same floor, under the same lights and fans and taking the same paper with him tomorrow. Hope i wont get too crazy over him and forget about my paper >< Just hope that i will sit somewhere infront of him so that i wont able to see him. If i'm able to see him, i dont think i can concentrate on my paper le -.- Forget it mann. he's not gonna care :P GOOOOOOOODLUCK FOR ME ! :D

Off to homeowork and studies! <3

Another switch

I should be sleeping at this hour but i'm here blogging. I was suppose to burnt some midnight oil but i wasnt really in a mood so here i am ^^

Read a few blogs and some were really very interesting and fascinating. There's a blog that kept you scrolling down for more. One of them was kind of unexpected. From what i know about that person, he wasnt really nice when i heard from someone and he turned out to be a total opposite person from what i knew. He was really great and you can gain alot from his blog. It's about life lessons and also his awesome little world. Those were awfully true and he could present it in a very... erm... daily life way? As in you can learn it from small little things that you always come across in life. It was very meaningful, of course. Guess i'm gonna be a regular visitor of that blog ^^

Gotta start work man... Stop procastinating!

Get over

So much had happened lately that i cant even catch up. Mostly, bad things. Yeah. That's when people start to be active on facebook or twitter or wad, i think. They wanted to release their anger, sorrow and their feelings. They might just want to hint to that someone that they still cares, they regrett, they still loves them. Facebook and Twitter seems like is becoming a small diary to everyone. A place to pour their feelings. It's not that they want the whole world to know how sad they felt and how pathetic they are but to let the others know, to understand about them. So that no one will go mess with them at the wrong time. But sometimes, i really dont understand why they want to tell the whole world how they feel. Maybe it's just someone who's their whole world. And mine just crashed lately. How sad?

Monkey

It's a long time since i got this crazy about books. 9hours 2 books. How nice?? :D Read Airhead by Meg Cabot and Snap by Carol Snow. Both books are very amazing and SNAP's ending is really SWEET ;3 How i wish i got someone like Duncan/Charles. Yeah, it wont happen in real life coz you dont get ppl to pop ups in ur pic out of nowhere. At least i would be in the shoes of that lucky girl :) Always, better than nothing.

Saturday NDP training was a CR @ Floating plaform. Of course we will go to F1 pit to eat and all this. This time we were at the ground floor so basically, we're surviving on fans. OF COURSE, some people would move the fan that will only blow them and poor us, has to fan ourselves -.- Soooo... there were at lot of ppl there but not as much compare to YOG AND AND AND!! I SAW ERIC !! I rmb he was wearing his pink shirt and pants O.O I bet he wont recognise me so i didnt wave at him or smile at him. I know i would look like an idiot -.- THEY CHANGE THE FLOATING PLATFORM. So i now noe that we can change the stage o.o They kind of build another layer of stage on top? and so the stairs are gone and the below was kind of empty so there was a bigger backstage compared to YOG. ANYWAYYY IT WAS FUNNN !! :D

Tick Tick Tick Tock

Time means everything. It makes you realise, to make you see clearer what's happening, make you see are you doing it correctly and also lots of lots of things.

It seems like someone realised something after standing outside the picture for a period of time. Of course something bad happened. She realised that whatever she doing now was wrong. She's had being blinded by all sort of stuff when she's in the picture. She couldnt see what she had become. She didnt noe why she had changed so much. One day, she left for awhile. She began to think back. She start to see the whole pictue. She realise. She made a decision. She told the truth. Now,she's sitting down there accompanied wif sadness, guilt. Being honest mades you the bad guy. How unfair?

A runaway

Korea trip was AWESOME FANTASTIC AMAZING. I LOVE IT !!!!! I hardly have time to miss Singapore or parents.

1st thing. MIDNIGHT FLIGHT SUCKS TO THE DAMN MAX !! It was very cold in the night and sleeping in the chair aint comfortable. We sleep, our neck hurts. If i stay up for the whole night, i wont able to make it in the day so i tried to cover myself wif blanket and then listen to music wif my eyes close to get as much rest as possible. I sleep then wake. Sleep again, wake again. The night's long. AND AND AND !! Meals on plane sucks to the damn max to !! For vege =x Its watery and it taste... weird? But i have to swallow it anyway -,- THE ENTERTAINMENT ON SINGAPORE AIRLINE IS AWESOME. You get to watch movies or dramas or whatever shit they offered and listen to music and games to play and and and alot of things lah ! Haha So kind of hav a little fun when coming back to SG.

Everynight people like to sneak to their friends room and party like nobody business. Most of the night, our dear QiQi would complaint that she's v tired and wanna turn in early. Poor me have to accompany her in our rooms, hence couldnt party wif eunice peiling & anna. NEVERMINNNDD :D had a pretty good time wif QiQi. She sound like a mom when she ask me to pack my stuff -.- Have fun while sneaking to their room 2times XD 2nd night at the resort?? 1st time sneaking to their rooms. The moment we open our door we saw ms cheng and mdm sutinah doing spotcheck on room 903? if i am not wrong our room was 901, all the way at the corner which is super duper creepy.coz is dark and everything. Back to the story ! So we're like OH SHIT !! * faster go back in and shut the door quietly THEN open snacks on the tv carry the blankets out on the sofa pretend we're watching tv as normal. HAH HAH HAH and then they came and knock on our door. Qiqi say we're preparing to sleep and i say i am eating coz i am munching food in my mouth -.- Around 12++ we sneak to their room successfully :D and then i had a foot fight wif anna -.- i was juz trying to straighten my leg D: she was sleeping opposite of me so yeah. Had a lot of fun ^^ 2ND TIME success.That was the last night so yeah... Stay oni for 10mins?? Or more. Next morning........ Mr andy came knocking on our door :" wa yst v tired ah? So early knock out already " Me and huiqi was like ya ya ya HAHAHA

Food there always serve hot coz most of it was like steamboat and bbq. then everytime we eat to the max. Rice there's awesome and over there it call bap. Anna will be like whole day calling BAAAAP.Most of the soup were salty and the dishes are ofter spicy SHIOK SHIOK SHIOK and board on the bus and SLEEP ! Our routine. Receive morning call Slack Wake WashUp Breakfast Bus Sleep SightSeeing Bus Sleep Eat Bus Sleep SightSeeing Bus Sleep Dinner Bus Sleep Hotel WashUp Pack Sleep BASICALLY WE ARE PIGS LOL!

Jude

Nothing much these days. Pretty normal. Flying off to korea tonight ^^ This will be the 1st time takin SIA ! I bet the seats there will be dam big compared to TigerAirways. Of course, tigerairways are budget airlines.Hope that this trip would be fun ! I shall pack pack pack now....... zzzz....... I'M GONNA MISS YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU D;


I'm crazy. Love you dao i crazy. I dont know me anymore :O

Worksheets left undone

You're there enjoying yet i am here sulking. How great can that be?? Haha.

Feel so excited for the upcoming Korea trip !! Gonna see lots of scenery and get to spend time wif my friendsssss~~~ hope it will be a smooth journey... Let's put our hands together and praay. My uncle is so goood ~~ he lent me the camera and also help me with alot of things ! Gosh, i feel so bad. I didnt do anything for him D; I shall buy damn lot seaweed for him ^^ As a repay ^^

Your strength might be your weakness. For example, the good people. It require a lot of strength and time to be a good person. Especially after he go through some shit stuff. People tends to become bad when things aint right, like maybe a fight? Or arguement? The good people often step a step back, hence, the 'bad' people got the advantage and climb over you. Of course, you need to tolerate all the shit stuff which require a lot of patience. Most of the people cant do that so that's why they fight back to protect themselves.It's a good thing for people to be good but however, there are always people who will take advantage of you hence, it could be a bad thing too. Your strength can be your weakness.

Just a question mark

Hatred might be a bad thing since this is the one who drove you mad and crazy. This is the reason why u turned good to bad. This made you do awful stuff which make people hates you and then you hate people... No end. Soooo... why not you SWITCH it? Juz a switch and then hatred might become a motivation. If you hate that person to the max, of course, you would want that person to be in misery. Of course, that person would also want to see you in misery. Then live ur life as good as possible, as if he dont affects you at all. Like that, he will end up even more angrier since his plans are not working and you're living happier. You can defeat that person by achieving good academic results and defeat him. Taadaaa.... Revenge done. You dont need to insult them and dirty ur mouth. You dont need to waste your time to plan how to bully them. This is the best way. It benefits you in 2ways. Its your choice. Do you wanna switch?

Building up the firewalls

People tend to believe someone's bad side as a their true face. Why?? Because they're afraid that they might get hurt again. They want to set up their protection against them. They wanna stay as far as possible away. They knew once they believe this person again, who knows he/she might uncover their ugly face and scare the freak out of them. That's why people always get far far away or attack you once they uncover their ugly faces. They attack because they want revenge. Or maybe another protection. They jus wanna scare you away or just wanna make sure you wont show it again. People are so vulnerable...

LIfe's going at a full speed with all the exams and revision shit. Got a feeling that i wont do well this time because of some... stuff? or influence? I dont know... Maybe i need to be more determination. Just like today. Ran 2.4km within 14.43minutes. So proud :D finally break my records after so many years. I usually ran within 17minutes so it was a huge improvement for me. All thanks to SYF. I felt that dancing SYF once was much more harder than running 2.4km. I dont get as tired as dancing SYF and i dont sweat as much as SYF... My lungs literally burned for oxygen but 2.4 dont. My breathing was in control... just that my legs cant work fast enough... Should've sprint earlier... Next tiem bahh !! :D

Study.. study... AHHHHHHHH BERSERK !!

Be next to ya

Tonight, once again, i missed the times that we spent tgt on the phone. How we would sneak under our blanket and talk overnight, till u or me fall asleep, or being discovered. Every night was so fun, risking everything just want to talk to you, and then you will share some super cold jokes me that make me shiver in the warm blankets. My mom would always suspect what was i doing in my blankets when she saw the vibrating of my body. Sometime, it would be so fun that i didnt watch how loud i sounded and in the end, woke my mom up. I miss how we start and end the night. The night was the most amazing time for us. Now, without you, the night is the most horrible thing to me.
Things were pretty normal when u were here. Everyone seems so perfect, angel like. Once you left, my whole world turn upside down. Everyone began to change their angel looks to a horrible demons. Things werent as simple as it seems anymore. Life's harder and tougher. More and more challenges ahead, afraid without you being at my side. Cant seem to trust anyone with my all. Its either to protect them or prevent things from getting worst, or i knew, telling you wont do any good or it will make it worst. I dont know... Telling her, she will bash you up. Telling her, she wont do anything which is pointless for telling. All i have is Milky.However, Milky cant be trusted anymore. Rules were set and i gotta follow. Seems like here's the only way. Perhaps you might to lazy to read or maybe cant be bothered anymore. I can feel that you dont care anymore? I dont know. That's what my feelings told me. What your actions told me. but deep inside i wan to believe you still care about me? right? Hope so... A hope is always a hope.

Water

I swear Shadow Kiss is the best book that Michelle Mead had ever wrote. It's overwhelming and fast-pacing. Its like drug that kept you flipping the pages. It's amazing. Better than Twilight but cant be compared to Morganville Vampires.

Shadow Kiss is a much more sadder compare to Morganville Vampires (MV) Due to the fact that you had to witness your love's death with your eyes and you cant do anything about it which is the most horrible thing in the world. I am very impressed with Rose. I dont think i might be as strong as her, physically or emotionally or whatever shit is that. I dont think i can deal with it other than going berserk. A moment, she was in heaven in Dimitry when everything was in the right place, everything was so perfect. Another moment, they were in the battle field. And then you watch him die (not really die but turn in to strigoi) right infront of your eyes and you cant do a single thing with your mom holding you back. I cant imagine how bad it felt. It must be damn bad. Worst i guess. This is the best book among the Vampire Academy. SO AWESOME !!!!!!!!!!!!! <3
That's why i love reading ^^
Then now she gotta go and kill Dimitri which was the alive Dimitry would want. I knew it was gonna be hard but i knew Rose would always do the right thing. THE NEXT BOOK. Dimitri was being saved by Lissa. Yay. but kind of disappointed though... haha Waiting for the next book. Hope it would be a finally happy ending. OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MYYYYYYYYY ............. i'm gonna faiint.

Entertainment

It had been so long and you still bring it up. You're the one who stab me 1st and you continue torturing me. Its okay, i dont blame you. One day, on your birthday, you come back on your knees, asking me to come back. I said no because i dont want to giv a moment of happiness yet a lifetime sadness. That's why i rejected you.
Turning your happiest day of your life to the saddest. It got my karma.

Covers

Kind of sad when you know the person you love is hurting the thing that you treasured the most. I know what i am suppose to do but i just dont want it. Not like this. From 10pm, my brain had been keep on instructing this to me. However, i am procastinating. Hoping there might be a chance for you to turn back and treasure it.Perhaps you might not... The test i gave you, you never passed. I dont think you will ever come back.What am i afraid of?? I got nothing to lose. The date will be set ^^ Its time.